Scrolling through my social media feeds, I noticed that I passed by not one, but three tragic posts. One was from a news source I follow about a tragic accident, another was news about a celebrity marriage ending and the last was a negative health report from a person I actually know.
I kept scrolling, glancing over the words, storing the information. I didn't even stop as my eyes "read" countless accounts from others, thinking of what I would make for dinner and how long the laundry would take until it was time to fold it and put it away.
Frozen with this chilling realization, I began to ask myself:
"When did I allow the tragedies of others to occupy the same space in my head as dinner menus and chores?"
"When did this sneaky desensitization paralyze my compassionate heart?"
More importantly:
"What can I do to stimulate this hard heart to beat for others again?"
Monday, May 19, 2014
Tuesday, May 6, 2014
What I Can't Do
Even though I want to, with every fiber of my being, I cannot put my kids in a bubble to protect them. It's counter-productive.
This parenting stuff is hard when you're trying to be authentic. I would venture to guess that it's hard even when you're being fake. So, I'll just say that parenting is hard.
Even in the bubble, it would be hard because I would just be creating kids that were just like me and these two, they need more than that.
They need community so that they can try on new ideas- ideas that may scare me, ideas that may challenge me, or change me.
So, no bubble.
No safety net.
No idea what I'd doing.
This parenting stuff is hard when you're trying to be authentic. I would venture to guess that it's hard even when you're being fake. So, I'll just say that parenting is hard.
Even in the bubble, it would be hard because I would just be creating kids that were just like me and these two, they need more than that.
They need community so that they can try on new ideas- ideas that may scare me, ideas that may challenge me, or change me.
So, no bubble.
No safety net.
No idea what I'd doing.
What I Should Tell Everyone
"How are you?"
"Busy."
Really? Can I not use any other words to describe my life right now? Sure, it's true, but how does that make other people feel when 'busy" is my response?
Will they be offended that I think my busy is better than their busy? Because, well, everyone I know is busy.
Will they feel the need to compete with my busy: "Yes, I see your ballet and scouts and raise you karate."
Will they just tune out, thinking that I'm just trying to be self-important?
In any case, "busy" isn't getting me anywhere. "Busy" halts communication. What do I want when I'm talking to someone else? Understanding, camaraderie, community. I want to know them and for them to know me. So, this martyr posture must cease.
I can do this.
How am I?
Fulfilled, humored, relieved, puzzled, enchanted, expectant, frustrated, hopeful, astounded...
Or, on those days when I feel overwhelmed, I could say "Never mind how I am, how are YOU?"
"Busy."
Really? Can I not use any other words to describe my life right now? Sure, it's true, but how does that make other people feel when 'busy" is my response?
Will they be offended that I think my busy is better than their busy? Because, well, everyone I know is busy.
Will they feel the need to compete with my busy: "Yes, I see your ballet and scouts and raise you karate."
Will they just tune out, thinking that I'm just trying to be self-important?
In any case, "busy" isn't getting me anywhere. "Busy" halts communication. What do I want when I'm talking to someone else? Understanding, camaraderie, community. I want to know them and for them to know me. So, this martyr posture must cease.
I can do this.
How am I?
Fulfilled, humored, relieved, puzzled, enchanted, expectant, frustrated, hopeful, astounded...
Or, on those days when I feel overwhelmed, I could say "Never mind how I am, how are YOU?"
Monday, May 5, 2014
Parking Lots and Waiting Rooms
It's where I'm spending most of my time. Picking up, dropping off, checking in, checking out, getting in and getting out. That's the season I'm in. And it's ok.
I'm not complaining about the waiting these days. In fact, apart from the shower, parking lots and waiting rooms have been where I getthe best ideas.
Occasionally, I can even get in a little reading while I'm waiting. That quiet, my friends, that moment when I'm only expected to sit and wait, that moment is wonderful.
So, I'm inviting you to wait along with me. We may read, or think or observe, but we won't be "doing." Nope, doing is not on the agenda in parking lots or waiting rooms.
I'm not complaining about the waiting these days. In fact, apart from the shower, parking lots and waiting rooms have been where I get
Occasionally, I can even get in a little reading while I'm waiting. That quiet, my friends, that moment when I'm only expected to sit and wait, that moment is wonderful.
So, I'm inviting you to wait along with me. We may read, or think or observe, but we won't be "doing." Nope, doing is not on the agenda in parking lots or waiting rooms.
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